Sometimes you must keep on keeping on. You know, move without regard or intent. Exist.

I think it was important for me to write that versus saying it aloud. I know many folks are all about manifesting these days. Still believing in traditional prayer, this is something I need to write not speak. It’s not that serious to me because of my faith in God and his works over my life. That keeping on, existing – or being non-responsive to the world around me is my way of trusting him.

Trust him y’all.

Over the last few months, I think it’s clear to me that life has been life-ing. But in that, I never lost sight of purpose or found a reason to have extended down days. I simply existed because of my trust in God.

It’s 2023, and I think back to the tragedy that was 2020. While everyone else was pandemic focused, I battled for my spiritual and mental well-being. I fought to reconnect to God and his will for my life. Some folks say they were lost in the world. I was championing unworthy causes in my head, a hostage and stranger in my own home, and a champion for ill-interpreted matters of the heart.

 I don’t think I was lost or disconnected. I wouldn’t even say detached.

I do know I had allowed too much over time to penetrate my beliefs, life, body, mind, and spirit. In turn, these things affected the trajectory of where my soul would live beyond.

During that time, a deliverance came my way. I know from that light that I received, darkness would continue to try and show its face seven different times in seven different ways. And it was important to always have discernment and sight if and when I encountered these attacks.

At times I slipped. Other times I engaged beyond what I saw while knowing better. But at no time did I not protect the gift that has been stirred – or allowed myself to be detoured again from walking God’s purpose through Christ’s salvation.

Antorris, what are you talking about? What is this? Are you ok? Why now? As always, mind your business but let the levels or layers of what I am sharing with you apply to you as needed. What’s for you in this message is for you – and what is for you ain’t my business.

No, but for real. Sometimes we veer off our path or forget where we have come from and healed through. Or persevered against. Be it high tides or a drought – remembering that it could be worse is key in keeping on. Or keeping the faith.

Throughout this week God stirred my being I woke up one morning with I Won’t Go Back by William McDowell on my heart and playing in my head. Visually – it was like the God Is Trynna Tell You Something scene from the Color Purple. I couldn’t get anyone to answer their phone or receive calls until I listen to that song… and yes, it led to worship in the shower. And again, mind your business. That’s my worship. Get your own praise! (I know I’m corny, it’s meant to be funny, so laugh, please).

I took that as a reminder versus a warning. Growing up in a word-focused (not play-play protocol religious structure focused cults valuing hats and choirs over saving souls) and spiritual (Father, Son, and Holy Ghost – because they are real) church-family (they definitely go hand-in-hand) – I place value in having learned that everything won’t come from a minister’s mouth, jump right out at you like images from a 3D movie, or be a miracle of some sort.

Often, we are spoken to in calming and gentle ways. Having been convicted before and seen the might and power of God in my correction, believe me, I prefer the still calmness of these reminders.

The stories of Esther and Moses were two of my favorite stories from the Bible. But there is no story like the story of Job as we navigate life. It teaches about suffering. But most of all unwavering faith and dedication. Love despite the loss. I encourage you all to read the story. And then listen to it on the audio bible or aloud. I promise you; it will give you some perspective about anything that you have went through, are going through, or will experience.

Reflecting on these learnings I thought to myself – remember. I had to remember why I have a reason not to go back. Then I must act on the need to exist and not backtrack because of being changed. I won’t go back. I can’t go back. I needed that. As a subtle reminder that God’s presence did truly come and change me. Saving me from me and the world around me is what it did.

I had been Esther, I had been Moses, I had been Job. Now while I have his grace and favor, there is no need to go back. Because like some of the greats, I have lived as some of the worst characters from the Bible and been delivered. Deliverance for $500 Alex – I’ll keep that please and thank you.

Job kept on keeping on. He existed to live on, put praise forward, and pray on. And you should too.

Image by rawpixel.com on Freepik